:( Week

What a week i had! I thank God for even the fact i can even write this post. It has been one hell of the busiest ever week i have ever faced in this turbulent Moscow. Lots of effort, lack of time, ever increasing list of task and sadness is basically the summary of my week.

It started off on Friday where we started preparing the food for orientation day. Lots of work to be done and we didnt get a single ounce of sleep till even after Orientation day. I was quite nervous as i was in charge for this event and really didnt want anything to go wrong. Thank God everything went smoothly and all the food was sold out. Great job guys both committee members and volunteers.

   

After orientation week i got cell group, paramedic and even my education to catch up with. So much to do and yet so little time. But yet i managed to do it and complete almost everything ( How? Next post i shall explain). Really im shagged, every bone emulsifying with pain, muscle embolized in pain and eyelids drooping every second. I hope for strength and wisdom and only HE can provide it

You know trust is something i have always emphasized but i regretfully cant trust anyone except me and HIM and really life is not worth investing onto other people's lives. The less involved i am , the better.

I just dont understand what with you and me. I still get the blame but i will take it. Hearing you laugh and seeing you smile makes me happy knowing your moving on. I realise its a hell of a effort to move away from you.....i just cant

Frail hope

WHAT A WEEK.....................

    
I just wanna pull out every single hair from my scalp. I just wanna tear and just keep to myself. Sometimes i wonder why i put up with all of this. It seems everything im losing meaning. I have lost my path and i carelessly wander and dwell upon the paths of pure frustration and confounded

I return back to classes after my sickness.Had to catch up with alot and Russian class is more difficult than ever and its really a challenge to keep up with it. More scoldings to deal with and yet MASSAD. Sometimes its just so difficult to do an event when your emotionally challenged and whats more things start to happen and suddenly everything looks bleak and no light at the end of the tunnel.

What can i do? Nevermind im done for today, hopefully it starts fresh again

I just wish i can understand you and your actions. You mean alot to me yet sometimes i feel so hurt and confused with what you do. Im trying to get over you but its so so difficult



                                         

A lesson learnt

Friendship isn't about whom you have known the longest... It's about who came, and never left your side

This expression  is so true and should echo what true friendship is all about. Often than not i have voiced out my views about the consequential nature of this world, where apparently people seem to hide behind sheep's skin.

Firstly why do people have to say bad things about each other behind their backs?Why is there a need to gossip and spread it like a raging brushfire? I fail to understand this....shouldnt we just focus on our lives and try to help people? 

Often i've come into situation when im between 2 groups of friends and somehow i ended up on the wrong side. So what happens to friendship? It seems the 2 sides grow closer to each other and both grow further apart from me.

I'm learning always and HE always places challenges in my life and hopefully i can go stronger. Thank you so much God for im learning.

I know now i just dont wanna get involved too much into people's lives and its just so tiring when the blame gets shifted. I need to focus more on myself and on God as often or not i have not. 

"Seek ye first the kingdom of God and all other things shall be added on to you"

                                          

A series of Unfortunate event

This week has been another trying week for me. I just hope i can be stronger through these challenges that im facing. I hope HE gives me wisdom and strength.

Well my week started well with clearing of most colloqs (Russian equivalent of Unit Exam) . Surprised myself in Histology and microbiology wasn't that difficult. Just as i was preparing to close the chapter for Unit 1 for all exams, the worst ever asthma attack occured to me to the fact that i couldn't even breathe. Two attacks in a day. But thankfully im well now and still alive

This week too has been clouded by things i know KNOW that i never wanna mess with again. I guess its true humans fail us and trusting people is really difficult. I feel i just need to separate from both parties and just move on with my life. My apologies goes out to all involved because i failed to solved it

P.S: I still struggle to cope with the emotional demands on Moscow, everyday i feel dishearten and see no meaning